The crows keep me posted each morning. I’ve noticed the three young ones are getting brave, wondering further apart. The mother is still in the highest trees looking out. I’m the first to arrive at work and she greets me with her caw, caw. My sister Deb told me to listen for the sound between the call, the silence, as it is part of their language. I skim the pool of ants and bugs, most still alive, getting the pool ready for the guests to enjoy pristine swimming. I put the bugs over the wall for the crows. They’ve come to expect it and the only reason they await my early arrival.


A touch of rain tonight, true enough to make the garden grow. The peas have already out grown the fences. The brassicas leaves cradle the rain, holding the precious lenses, magnifying purple veins. The broccoli is sky high, the kohlrabi is billiard ball size and the cabbage can’t be denied. 



The weed is well on it’s way. Weird not to have to hide it, like I’ve done for the last 20 years. Not that I tried very hard. They will be turned quick and have the entire month of August to bloom.


Had a large Wolf Spider in the bed the other night. I saw it as I was getting in and swooped it onto the floor. Instincts kicked in and I squashed it. Deb puts spiders and bugs outside, she does it with a feather duster. I don’t have one. Usually I just leave them alone. I was afraid the spider would give me bad dreams, but it didn’t. Perhaps I’m too old to feel. I killed a snake once for no good reason when I was a youngster that haunts me still. It’s important to be careful about what you kill.


My father got me looking into the sky and the running creek. It’s been my downfall and my salvation. 


When you get older the apologies never given start to add up. I wouldn’t help with homework. I was distant. I was younger then, full of anger that I thought was virtue. Looking back, I’m not sure I could do anything different. Every injustice rippled through my body and reflected out. I tried to teach them through my indiscretions that they didn’t have to be like me.

That’s the best I could think to show.


The swallows swoop in the evening, I think of them as giants. Dinosaurs flying through the air from ancient times, mouths open, eating mosquitos, chewing through clouds, just in time to reveal the setting sun.

7 thoughts on “father

  1. mountaincoward

    I’ve killed a few things recently – a moth and a fly. I felt really guilty and wouldn’t normally kill either but my skin has been itching all over since the hot weather we had the last couple of months (it always itches in hot weather) and I’m getting short of sleep and temper!

    Didn’t know that about the silence between the caws – interesting – I’ll listen out for that as we have a rookery down the road from my house…


      1. mountaincoward

        I actually love hot weather – just, for some reason, my skin hates it. It doesn’t burn or anything in the sun though. It’s just like, if my blood gets warmer, I itch – it’s like an internal thing somehow.


  2. Jim R

    Our local crows are kind of noisy lately. I find them amusing and smart. If they find you an unwelcome intruder, they will harass you to no end. Our other vocal residents are wrens. They are busy feeding mouths in the little house attached to the deck. We sit there for dinner each evening. They approach with a worm or bug in beak and chatter at us to back off. We sit still. Instinct forces them to come closer. The young ones will fledge soon.

    I would be sorely disturbed by a wolf spider in bed with me. Spiders are my phobia. I am usually able to be calm. But that would delay getting to sleep. Yes, be careful what you kill. It can come back to haunt you.

    I enjoyed Father’s Day yesterday. Got to talk with 2 of the 3 who live 1000 mi away. The 3rd drove an hour and a half so she could be with us. Hadn’t seen her in person since February. We had a long hug and visit. Good for the spirit.

    Have a good week. Take good care of the garden and the precious weed. We can’t grow that legally here. It would grow great in our rich soils. But, Illinois is only an hour away. Legal to buy there.


    1. underswansea

      We also have wrens, they do like to make a fuss. Regarding the wolf spider, my neighbour was bit by one and the poison got into his blood stream (very uncommon) and he was on medication for a good length of time to stop his itching.

      Good to hear you had a good Father’s Day. It sure is nice to hear from the kids, even if you can’t be with them. It must have been nice to see your daughter.

      I bet you could grow giant weed plants there. It is very enjoyable to grow. Most I give away as it would be impossible to consume. Then again I am a lightweight, one puff and I’m usually toast.

      I hope you have a great week. Take care.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Anonymous

    Feather duster, be damned! If a wolf spider decided to hop into my bed, I would kill it in a heartbeat! Too close…too close! Deb


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