Early August

Horsethief Fire. Taken in the evening by Lisa.

The valley bottom is thick with smoke. Plenty of fires burning. So far nothing threatening. Just a lot of smoke making it hard to breath for people with lung issues. Plenty of people walking around with masks.

Jimmy says he has to smoke a cigarette just to get some fresh air.

The Resort is busy, as is the valley, on the long weekend. I am on my fourteenth straight day and it will keep up for awhile.

We have been furnishing a house to be made into a BNB. Our job is to put together furniture made in China. It is amazing stuff. You start off with flat box with panels and a freezer bag of assorted hardware. When you open it up and take everything out all you can think is, FUCKKK! But somehow it all goes together. None of it is high quality. The wood is manufactured from sawdust and glue. The veneer has been printed on an inkjet printer and the vinyl fixed to the ‘wood’. It all fits in a flat box that can be stacked miles high in a shipping container. That’s some crafty engineering.

The garden is out in full force. The smoky air acts as a flat filter giving the same light to the bottom of the leaves as the top. It is like the plants are in a green house.

The youngsters at work, from the UK and Ontario, have their belongings in their vehicles just in case they have to make a run for it. They haven’t seen anything like this. I tell them, it is good to be prepared but not to panic. I don’t say it, but it can get a lot worse.

The Albertan tourists and second home owners keep flocking in like nothing is wrong. They bitch that the pool isn’t crystal clear, like they haven’t noticed burnt ash has been falling on it nightly.

It will keep up for awhile like it always does. August has become a bitch.

Late July

Woke up about 3:30. The bedroom smelled like smoke so bad I got up and went outside to make sure nothing was on fire. The moon was orange in the west. Everything was okay. Thats the way it is. A few fires burning close by. Nothing threatening.

***

Fire fighters are up from the United States to help fight the fires. They drive army style trucks with the name of their squad on the side. Forest fire fighters are called Hot Shots in the US. They must be contracted by the BC or Federal government to help out and we could use all the help we can get. I am sure every local citizen is grateful for their service.

I looked up two of the firefighter crews, they were from Idaho and California. Hopefully those areas won’t be short if fires break out there.

***

Invermere’s Mayor dusted off his Covid Speech, tooling it to the wildfires, welcoming ‘Our Alberta Friends’ to the community, regardless of impending threats.

https://calgaryherald.com/news/local-news/invermere-mayor-welcomes-tourists-despite-two-nearby-wildfires

Agreed, things are not as bad as they can get, so why let a little thing like smoke, flames and breathing clean air deter tourists from spending money in the valley grocery, galleries, cafes and hardware stores.

A reminder our politicians are clowns, concerned about they and their friends monetary interests instead of doing the right thing for people and the environment.

Not surprising. We should be used to it by now.

***

The kids came over today and helped in the garden, picking veggies and filling their baskets with peas, giving the old wrinkled ones to Willow or Grandpa.

***

Plenty of wasp nests this year to be dealt with at the resort and home. Tomorrow morning when it is chilly and they are docile I will try to move them. Almost impossible when they are protecting combs and laying eggs. Most will end up dead. Unfortunate, if it was up to me, we would mind them, knowing we will get stung occasionally as the price of sharing. We have become intolerant of the natural word, considering even ants and some plants a nuisance.

***

The next five or six weeks will be busy. I have started working 7 days a week. Saturday and Sunday should be shorter days. The overtime will come in handy in a tourist hotspot where prices continue to increase. Not that we are complaining it is the same everywhere.

***

The winds are up. The trees are swaying one way and the clouds are going another. Never good when the bush is on fire.

***

I wrote the above last night but didn’t publish it. I thought I may have been too judgmental of the Mayor of Invermere and wanted to think about it overnight. I did soften it a little, even taking out the word ‘shill’.

When I arrived at work this morning the staff parking area was filled with two large trucks pulling wake boats. They were from Alberta. The word staff used to describe them was entitled.

The outside pool and hot tubs had a skim of ash and burnt needles floating on the surface. Things can get worse, no matter how hard we look on the bright side.

Travel

If someone asked me what has changed with the weather, I’d say, it’s windy now especially when it is hot in July and August. You can almost feel the moisture being sucked out of the ground. I can’t remember it that way when I was young.

I may be wrong. I am often called an imbecile by plenty of folks because I’ve never travelled. I can’t argue with them. However, I know what I see, the garden backs me up as well as the lake and mountains. I feel sorry for them, they are changing, some would say dying or even burning. I feel sorry because of the abuse. Still, they will be here much longer than we will.

We had word a fire was threatening the power supply to the valley. I thought about the food I have in the freezer. I thawed a leg of lamb and made vindaloo for the clan. Not a summer meal, but cooler than roasting it in the oven.

Several fires have started near by in the past couple days. The Horsetheif Fire came over the ridge this afternoon. It looks to be moving quickly. Edgewater, a community 25km north of us, is reporting burnt ash and needles falling on decks and vehicles.

The wind driving the fire is blowing south/east while a thunderstorm came in heading north/west. A double whammy.

Meanwhile, I am on my perch, where I’ve always been, the imbecile that I am, listening to tourists from Alberta race up and down Main Street in loud cars, RV’s and motorcycles.

This weekend I encountered a group of old bastards about my age, there must of been thirty of them, riding Indian Motorcycles all dressed in chaps and leather vests with the Indian insignia. I couldn’t help but think looking at these dip shits that we are all doomed.

It won’t be coking coal making steel that is our demise. It will be rich fuckers getting on planes, entitled to do as they please, without consequence, that will catch up to us.

Not that anybody’s listening, if you want to make a difference, stay home. Don’t bring millions of dollars worth of toys into a place you know nothing about just because you can. Stay home and make a life there.

Fireweed

Lisa and I headed out early to avoid the ruck. The town put on Valley Appreciation Day. It used to be called Visitor Appreciation Day. Before that it was called Alberta Appreciation Days. Alberta tourists/2nd home owners, making up the majority of visitors to the Columbia Valley. Regardless of the name it is a good day to get the fuck out of the valley bottom.

The huckleberries are under there somewhere.

We took to the mountains in search of huckleberries. We had success. The huckleberries were out and small. We stumbled onto a few good patches to fill our buckets.

Willow rustled rodents. Her tongue swollen and panting. She is a good dog. Lisa says I have to mind her better as she is getting old. I don’t have the heart to shut down her fun even if it’s for her own good.

Getting a swim in the creek. Perfect to cool off.

Lisa kept picking after I reached my limit. We creeped down the mountain in the afternoon, knowing town would be clear, cautious never the less.

A very fine day.

Early Morning

We call it smoke but it’s smog and we better get used to it.

Up early. Tough week. I let my temper get the better of me a couple times. Luckily I am only caustic with my tongue, not like before.

It would be easy to say they got what they deserved. Tourists, rich, entitled, put in their place. But it makes me sad. So it can’t be good. I used to love putting a bully in his place. Punching up has hurt my family immeasurably. I am a fool not to go along. Look how good the people who punch down do.

The garden is up. Plenty of smoke on the horizon and on the water, early morning. The spuds could be ready, who knows for sure, the grasshoppers have eaten the blossoms.

July Garden

Even Willow was powerless against the grasshoppers.

The garden is doing it’s best after being ravaged by grasshoppers. The grasshoppers are still around in abundance but not eating as much as when they were small. When we have vegetables from the garden for dinner I remark my thankfulness that the grasshoppers were kind enough to leave it for us. They were ravenous bastards.

No carrots this year. Almost everything had to be replanted. Strangely they didn’t like peas, which are about 6 feet tall and covered in pods. The tomatoes, they mostly left alone. Same as the zucchini. Everything else was at their mercy.

The cannabis is coming and I’m about to trick it into thinking it’s dying so it will flower. The grasshoppers ate it as well, but it fought back on its own. The grasshoppers who indulged were last seen, wearing dark glasses, listening to jazz, riding vans, driven by a ladybug, down to SF, Haight Ashbury, to find themselves. I’m happy I could, at least, convert a few. The stoned grasshoppers remaining are degenerates, happy to listen to Led Zeppelin overflowing from the gardeners earbuds. They are hard to motivate, but great to have a conversation with once you get them going, unfortunately they still like to snack.

We will miss the carrots. I planted zucchini in many of spots in the garden that the grasshoppers destroyed. We are going to have ‘chini coming out our ears. I won’t be able to give them away. My friends will see me coming and scatter.

AI

WordPress now has an AI editor to help with writing. It can translate, correct spelling and grammar, which is helpful. Now it can simplify, expand, change tone and summarize.

Is that different from correcting spelling? I love a world where I don’t have to know how to spell.

Could I have ever put this to use when I was a youngster. Dragging on, hit simplify, not sure what to say, pick expand. Pissed or happy, pick change tone. It could have been my super power.

Now everyone will have it. Shit.

summer

A wind storm blew through this evening. Rain was forecast. It never transpired. The wind sucked the moisture from the ground, drying the grasses and trees.

Campfires have been banned across BC as the back country dries.

Dry winds in the valley have been commonplace for many years now as the climate warms.

This year saw an abundance of grasshoppers, supposedly, due to dry conditions.

Forest fire season is just getting going.

***

The Canadian government’s stance is; we must adapt, and ultimately buy our way out of climate change. We must switch to expensive, inefficient electric vehicles and solar electricity. The more people change the cheaper and more efficient they will become we are told. It sounds like a con in light of all the many things we could do right now to cut emissions. Unfortunately the cuts would only hurt the wealthy and that is not acceptable.

***

The changes we are told we must make, electric cars, solar panels, etc. will also mostly benefit the wealthy who own the companies ready to provide these products. It is our only salvation we our told by government and media, so get on board!

***

Meanwhile, on my little spot on earth, the government and business community, cater to second home owners. Homes only occupied for a small time of the year. BNB’s that put working people out of housing in favour of vacationers. Vacationers polluting with recreation vehicles such as boats that sully Lake Windermere and its shores, dead anyway from second homes. Canada welcomes tourists by the millions coming on planes and automobiles. Can there be a bigger excess of emissions than the well off and rich recreating?

***

You will never hear a word from government or even staunch environmentalists, who make up a good portion of carbon emitting recreationists about this. Instead the mantra is we must buy electric cars. It will save and absolve us. We can buy our way out of this, giving our money to those same wealthy second home owners and recreationists who own the companies who provide the ‘solution’.

***

We have a McDonalds in town now. It’s just been built and opened. People love it. It’s like we have come of age. On one side of it, is Lordco Auto Parts store, on the other side will be a new gas station. It is a development built by Brett Wilson, Canadian investment banker and former panelist on the TV show Dragons’ Den.

I stopped at McDonalds on the way to work the other day. The drive through was two lanes and freshly paved. I was the only one in line. I ordered a breakfast sandwich and coffee. They took my money and gave me coffee and told me to wait in stall two where they would bring out my sandwich. I idled for 10 minutes, burning fuel, wondering where the next gasstation was, before figuring they forgot about me, risk being late for work, l left with my $9 coffee.

I shouldn’t have been there in the first place and it taught me a lesson. Brett Wilson reminded me hucksters are alive and well.

***

The climate is changing. I see it. If it is man made, as media and government say, and why take the chance it isn’t, there is plenty we could do right now to make a difference. But we don’t. I do know, beware of grifters saying it will be okay as long as you purchase the remedy.

Old Tracks

Hind and front. Glad we came along later.

Before bed I thought I’d better make sure the garden gate was closed. Walked outside into a warm evening. I never walk anywhere without boots. The garden is only thirty paces from the basement door. I figured I was safe to go barefoot. Half way there I stepped on a wasp and got stung in the crotch of the big toe and the tall one next to it. Damn. That’s seven stings this year! It could be my new record.

I remember when I was about four, one morning, I took a stick and knocked down a nest in the shed. I was stung on the nose. That night I was with my Dad picking raspberries at my Aunt Elenor’s place and got stung on the ass.

Dad thought it was hilarious I was stung on the nose and ass in the same day. He laughed telling Mom when we got home. I couldn’t see the humour in it at the time. Now I am a Dad and Grandad it is damn funny. I can’t help laughing when I reminisce.

Long Weekend/Tourists

A good long weekend all in all. Lisa and I got out of Dodge early on the busiest days.

No shortage of entitled idiots from Alberta. They were everywhere. I believe they are something we have to accept like, dry summers, grasshoppers, wasps and forest fires.

Speaking of grasshoppers and wasps. The grasshoppers are everywhere, hitting you in the face and jumping ahead of every step.

On Sunday unloading wood I rearranged the woodpile. The grasshoppers started jumping. Before I knew it. I had disturbed a nest in the woodpile. Got stung about six time on the hand before I realized they weren’t grasshoppers. Angry bastards. I had to split the load of wood 20 feet away from the woodpile. More hauling later. My hand is sorer today than yesterday.

Still those fucking tourists are more of a nuisance, I swear to God/ 😉

Palliser Pass

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Tag: humour